Heroshipping
by Skylo
Summary: When Link realizes Zelda has an arranged marriage, he seeks out the smartest person he knows for advice.


Heroshipping

PAIRING: MarioxLink, Link and Meta Knight friendship

RATING: PG-13

WARNING: Yaoi, yuri (because most of the Gerudos are female so we must assume that the one described is female), potentially offensive views on the relationships between damsels in distress and their heroes. A different perspective on Link's character, and a few possibly OOC background characters.

KEY: _**Thoughts**_  
8== D Penis Page Break 8== D

A/N: I've seen a lot of people say this pairing is creepy, and of course, because it's me, I disagreed.  
So hopefully you'll agree with me.  
If not, comment and tell me why! I personally think they have compatible traits, given I push the boundaries of their character a bit.  
If you don't get some of the references in here, don't worry. I'm a Zelda nerd. I have a Nintendo 64...and no friends. jk jk. Enjoy!

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Mario was awoken from his dream by a soft knock at the door. He hopped out of bed, jumping into his bunny slippers. He grabbed a baseball bat from underneath his pillow and inched towards the door.  
"What's the password?"  
A voice on the other side of the door sighed loudly.  
"It's me."  
He dropped the bat in relief. No matter how many times Link woke him up in the middle of the night, he couldn't risk letting his guard down. Not when his roommate (Luigi) slept like the dead. The thought of something horrible happening to his brother made his blood boil. He still didn't trust most of the Brawlers at Smash Mansion.  
He slid the lock out of place and opened the door. Link entered, plopping gratefully onto Mario's bed.  
"I can't sleep."  
"You never can, Link," Mario replied in his slightly warbly voice. He crawled back underneath the covers and snuggled them up to his chin.  
"Now, what's-a wrong?"  
Link looked up at him, his blue eyes so full of pain and confusion it startled Mario. He'd never seen Link so troubled.  
"It's Zelda," his voice cracked very slightly. "She's engaged."  
Mario let the air out of his lungs.  
"And not to you."  
Link nodded. He bent his head and let his blonde hair fall over his eyes.  
"To a Gerudo. The Gerudo valley and Hyrule Castle decided to end their feud and maintain peace."  
He smiled weakly.  
"If I hadn't saved her all those years ago, she would've never been able to patch this up..." The smile on his face faded. He looked up at Mario again.  
"Why'd I do it, Mario? Why did I waste so much of my life just to have my one promise at happiness snatched away?"  
Mario sighed.  
"Link, let me tell you something. When I first met Peach, I knew nothing about her. Then she was kidnapped by Bowser, and suddenly I felt like...I had made a promise. After I saved her, I told her I loved her. She told me that she didn't even know me."  
He let out a sad laugh.  
"The funny thing is, I didn't know her either. I was foolish. I'm not even sure I did love her. But I felt like I had a duty to marry her."  
Mario looked up at him.  
"You can shape your own destiny, Link. You can't live the rest of your life like some fairytale prince."  
Mario rested a hand on his shoulder.  
"It's just not you."  
Link nodded, but the sadness stayed in his eyes.  
Mario looked at him with pity.  
Link had been fighting for Zelda since he was very young. He'd wasted all of his childhood on it. He had to mature so quickly, he never even had time to make some decent friends. He had so many unanswered questions, and only his close friend, Mario, to turn to.  
His thoughts trailed off as Link looked at him. His eyes held an emotion Mario couldn't place. Mario shut his mouth and moved his hand from the boy's shoulder to ruffle his hair. He gave Link a half-hearted smile.  
"What do you need marriage for, anyway? There's so much you haven't experienced-"  
Link lunged at him.  
Before he could register what was happening, he felt lips on his and his back met the bed. Mario's mind suddenly became a torrent of questions. A small, muffled noise escaped him as Link slid on top of him.  
_**Maybe I gave him the wrong idea...**_ Mario thought.  
He immediately held himself responsible, like he always did. It was just a habit.  
Both were blushing madly when they broke away.  
Mario's breath was short.  
"Why'd y-you do th-that?"  
"Sorry," Link wiped his mouth on his arm, leaping up quickly to leave.  
"W-Wait!" Mario called after him as the boy ran from the room.  
He tilted his head.  
_**What was that all about?**_

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Link ran as fast as he could. He dashed up the staircase and to his second-floor dorm. His roommate was awake, but luckily Meta Knight never asked him about anything. He honestly didn't think he cared. Link glanced at him, failing in hiding the look on his face, and jumped into bed. He shut his eyes tight. But he knew he would not be getting to sleep. After a while he sighed and opened his eyes.  
"Hey, Mets?" Link had given him that little nickname a few months ago. It stuck.  
The Knight grunted.  
"What does it mean when you kiss someone?"  
Meta grumbled something under his breath.  
"How am I supposed to know? That's human stuff."  
The hero looked away dejectedly.  
"Oh."  
A moment of silence, then the little creature sat up and sighed.  
"Well I heard Ness ask Snake about it once. Snake said that to most people it symbolizes "love", but to him, it was just "lust". Whatever that means," he replied, laying back down.  
Link bit his lip.  
_**Which did I mean?**_  
"So I take it you went to see Mario?" Meta's tone was anything but innocent.  
Link's cheeks turned pink.  
"What? No..."  
"Oh, I think you did. Everyone knows that you sneak into his room in the middle of the night. And since Luigi could sleep through a hurricane you didn't think any of us would be the wiser."  
Link felt his blush grow darker.  
"The wiser to what?"  
Meta's cute face was somehow very suggestive. "Gee, I dunno..."  
By now the hero's cheeks were a furious red.  
"It's not like that. We just talk."  
Meta shrugged.  
"Hey, it's none of my business. All I'm saying is be careful tomorrow. Luigi isn't as heavy a sleeper as you think, and he has quite a big mouth."  
All the color drained from Link's face.  
"Uh, y-you don't think he'd tell anyone, do you?"  
Meta shrugged again. "He would never _tell_anyone. But knowing him, if he saw whatever it is you two did, it's only a matter of time before it just slips out."

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The next morning, Link refused to come down for breakfast. Mario sighed. He was really hoping to ask Link about last night. He opened the fridge and grabbed an apple, tossing it to Yoshi. The green creature caught it in his mouth and happily swallowed it in one bite.  
Mario dug around in the freezer for a while. He really needed something to calm his nerves.  
He turned to the others. "Hey, where's my ice cream?"  
"Ooooh..." Sonic scratched his head. "I'm sorry. If I'd known it was yours I wouldn't have let Link make off with it."  
Mario gave him a small nod and exited the kitchen.  
Once outside Link's room, Mario paused and took a deep breath. He had no idea what he wanted to say, but he really _really_ needed his ice cream.  
He knocked, and didn't wait for an answer before pushing the door open.  
Link sat cross-legged on his bed, looking closely into the ice cream carton as he scraped the sides with his spoon.  
"You know you don't have to knock, Mets. It's your room too."  
Mario cleared his throat.  
Link looked up, and his eyes grew round.  
"Mario.."  
Mario's heart beat fiercely. He was so scared.  
"Link.."  
He crossed the room and seated himself on the edge of the Hylian's bed.  
"Oh, you're here for the ice cream, right?"  
Mario almost said no. He almost said that he wanted to talk. He almost said he wanted him to tell him why he kissed him.  
But then he remembered just how badly he wanted his ice cream.  
"Yes..."  
Link took the spoon he'd been using and stuck it in Mario's face. There was a bit of ice cream on it. Without thinking about it, he allowed the boy to feed it to him.  
He leaned forward in anticipation as Link looked into the carton once more. He held the carton up to show him.  
"It's all gone. Sorry."  
Mario snatched it from him.  
"Don't you know anything?"  
He used the carton as a cup to drink the melted ice cream inside, and then began to lick the inside as far as he could reach. Once he was finished, he licked his lips and punched Link playfully.  
"See? Addicts learn to make do."  
The other blinked.  
"You're addicted to ice cream?" Being best friends with the guy, he should've known this.  
Mario nodded.  
"Sadly. Even Brawlers like me have their weaknesses."  
He was quite surprised when Link unconsciously used his finger to rub a bit of ice cream off of Mario's face. He stuck said finger in his mouth, and froze.  
Mario was blushing slightly, unblinking as he watched.  
"Uhm, sawy," Link apologized around his finger.  
There was a pause, then Mario laughed out loud.  
"You're so weird."  
Link took the finger out of his mouth and laughed too.  
"Hey, Link?"  
"Hmm?"  
"Can I ask you something?"  
"Sure," he replied sticking his finger into the carton to get at the ice cream Mario had missed.  
"Why did you kiss me?"  
Link whipped his head up, a bit startled.  
"I'm not sure.." he admitted.  
Mario lowered his gaze, not quite getting the kind of answer he'd hoped for.  
"Erm, well, okay," he hopped off the bed and stopped in the doorway.  
"If you ever need to talk about anything, let me know."  
"O-Okay," Link replied before Mario dashed away towards the kitchen.

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At dinner that night, the Smash Mansion was especially talkative.  
Mario found this strange. They all seemed to be making small talk. He knew for a fact that none of the Brawlers were interested in idle chatter.  
Even more suspicious, nobody argued.  
Not once.  
He swept his gaze around the group, frowning in disapproval.  
"Will someone please tell me what's wrong with everyone today?" he finally snapped.  
The others fell silent.  
"A little birdie told us that you finally got your hands up Link's skirt," Snake burst out, roaring with laughter. He couldn't take it. It was just too funny!  
Link's entire face flushed red.  
"What are you talking about?!"  
A few of the others snickered, and the smart ones remained silent.  
Mario also blushed, and Snake fell out of his chair, laughing so hard Mario was sure he'd pee his pants.  
"Who told you that, anyway?" Link growled, standing from his chair.  
Snake didn't stop laughing. He pointed towards the door, where someone was trying for a quick getaway.  
"Luigi?" Mario yelped.  
His brother looked so helpless. He stared fearfully at Link.  
"I'm sorry! He asked me about it and, well, it just came out!"  
He turned to his brother.  
"I swear I didn't mean to tell him!"  
All eyes turned back to Mario and Link.  
"Tell him what?" Bowser ventured.  
"Pika pika?"  
"Yeah, what exactly were they doing?" Lucario asked.  
"Nothing!"

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That night, Link found himself waking up again in the middle of the night. Normally he'd immediately head to Mario's room, but after that incident a few days ago, he didn't really feel comfortable with it. Yes, they'd talked about it, but that didn't guarantee that Mario had forgiven him yet. He also didnt want anybody to see him and believe what they were talking about at dinner. Besides, how is he supposed to tell Mario what he dreamed about?  
He sighed and rolled over.  
"Mets?"  
Meta Knight groaned, wiping a hand across his face.  
"_Whaaaat_?"  
"Can I talk to you?"  
"Sure..." he was clearly drifting off again.  
"I had a dream..about Mario.."  
"That makes sense."  
"How?"  
"It's clear that you guys are best friends...Maybe even more than that...he's bound to wind up in some of your dreams..." he replied sleepily.  
Link blushed darkly.  
"Well, it wasn't exactly a dream..."  
Meta sat up.  
"No? Was it a nightmare?"  
"Not exactly..."  
Meta tapped his chin in thought. After a moment, something seemed to occur to him, and he laughed evilly.  
"Wow, you've really got the hots for him, huh?"  
"No way! It was just a dream."  
"Mmhmm _sure_," he drawled, laying back down.  
Link fell silent for a minute. Meta was almost asleep when he spoke again.  
"Well what do you think it meant?"  
"I think," he sighed, "that I'm going to get woken up way more often unless you find that out first. You need to tell him how you really feel."  
"I don't know how I really feel!"  
"Well then ask _him_ how _he_ feels. He's a way more collected person than you. Chances are, he'll have a direct answer."  
Link nodded and smiled to himself.  
"You're pretty smart, you know that?"  
"I'm a problem solver," Meta shrugged.

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Mario was awoken by a loud knock at the door. He sat up and grumbled, rubbing his eyes.  
"Come in," he yelled, too lazy to actually get up. Link entered the room, looking a bit shocked.  
"H-Hey..."  
Mario blinked.  
"Oh, hey."  
Link looked around.  
"Um, is something wrong?" Link asked, not used to Mario being so unguarded.  
"Other than disturbing my sleep, no..." Mario yawned.  
The boy closed the door and crossed the room to Mario's bed, suddenly gaining courage.  
"I have something to ask you."  
Mario yawned again.  
"Shoot."  
"How do you feel about me?"  
Mario laughed, and was about to crack a joke when he saw the intense look in Link's eyes.  
"Oh, you're serious."  
Link nodded.  
"Well..." Mario scratched the back of his head. "I, um, think that you have a lot of heart and-"  
"I didn't ask what you _think_. I asked how you _feel_."  
Mario blinked a few times. And for some reason, he became angry.  
"I _feel_ that you're confused. I _feel_ like you need more friends. I _feel_ like you want me all to yourself and you were so scared of losing me that you _kissed_me!"

Link's eyes watered. He never cried. Never. But for some reason he wanted to.

"I _feel_ that you're selfish, and childish, and naïve! And I _feel_ that you're stupid for thinking for one _second_ that I would _ever_ abandon you!"  
Link's tear-filled eyes widened. He stared at the enraged Mario for several minutes, not moving, not breathing.  
Mario's angry eyes burned into his.  
Link pulled him into a desperate hug, burying his face in Mario's nightshirt. Mario froze up in shock. But a second later he was hugging him back.  
Neither of them said anything as they pulled away, smiling at each other.  
"I'm sorry," Link said to him.  
Mario laughed. "Me too."  
He watched as Link got up and left, waving goodbye. His heart really went out to the boy.

~Fin~


End file.
